“Fitness has Nothing to Do with Fatness”: Teen Athletes Speak Out about Body Positivity

If the older generations looked to magazines like Vogue and Cosmopolitan to see prevailing beauty standards, teens today have a guide to the model body, how to (unhealthily) achieve it, and their self-worth if they can’t, in their pockets all day, with no escape. Social media. It’s flooded with get-fit-quick schemes, detox teas, and photoshop, and it’s no secret that the perfected bodies teens see on Instagram are a major prompter for eating disorders and body image issues. And while teen CrossFitters probably aren’t obsessed with fashion models like their peers, the people they see as they scroll do create a high standard that can be just as destructive.

17-year-old Emma Spath knows the consequences of this new cultural touchpoint particularly well. Spath qualified for the 2018 CrossFit Games in the 14-15 division, years after setting her mind on getting to the Games when gymmate Brooke Ence earned a trip in 2015.

• “Watching Brooke compete was definitely when I decided I wanted to go to the Games,” Spath said. “Seeing her on TV, I knew that’s where I wanted to be.”

In the 2017 Age Group Online Qualifier, 14-year-old Spath placed 36 worldwide, just 16 spots out of the Games. So when the 2018 Open and AGOQ rolled around, she came out with a vengeance and ambition that seemed to surprise even her.

• “I think I redid one of the workouts three times,” Spath laughed, recalling that she tried to give herself as many tries as possible to qualify for the Games.

Spath recalled deleting social media, advising her friends not to talk to her, and avoiding the leaderboard in order to stay focused during the weekend of the Qualifier. And in the end, it paid off. Spath placed 18 in the AGOQ in 2018, punching her ticket to Madison. After scores had been finalized the Wednesday after the AGOQ, Spath got the good news surrounded by her favorite people.

• “It’s an amazing feeling,” Spath said. “It was one of my favorite moments of my whole life.”

As the school year finished up and Spath looked down the barrel of a summer full of training, she took on a new challenge to up her game — counting macronutrients. According to Spath, though, her motivations weren’t in the right place.

• Spath: “I wasn’t just working out to be a CrossFit Games athlete, I was working out to look more like the CrossFit Games athlete I thought I should be.”

As her drive to be taken seriously as a Games athlete grew throughout the summer, Spath fell into a cycle of restricting and binging, resulting in a Binge Eating Disorder. For the month leading up to the Games, Spath moved to Idaho to live with her coach so she could focus on training with other competitors. As a result of the intensity of her training and restrictive eating, Spath recalls her body constantly telling her to “give me food!” which led her to repeatedly binge eat.

To many teen athletes, Barden’s message of “eat less, go to bed hungry, burn more than you consume” was heartbreaking and wrong, Spath among them. Diet-culture opponents were quick to sound off in the comments, sharing messages of disappointment for Barden and encouragement for girls going through these struggles.

• “It worries me that some people might believe you after reading this post,” AGOQ athlete Olivia Skogstrand commented. “Reading what you wrote can be really triggering for others and people like you writing this is one reason why people develop eating disorders. They believe that they have to starve themselves to feel worthy and good.”

But, of course, there are other girls who have been saved by CrossFit. Among them are Delia Moises and Karis Jackson, two tough 14-15 competitors placing 20th and 70th respectively in the 2020 AGOQ. Like many of their peers, they’ve been competitive athletes in a variety of sports — volleyball, cross country, and track — and were driven by an urge to look skinnier. Both Moises and Jackson developed eating disorders, restricting their calories to extreme amounts, still never satisfied with their bodies.

• Moises: “I would avoid eating in social situations, cancel plans so I could get my run in, and wouldn’t eat cake on my birthday.”

Jackson was struggling just like Moises, and when she saw the 2017 CrossFit Games documentary, “The Redeemed and the Dominant,” she knew that was her way out. Jackson was eating as few as 600 calories a day, but when CrossFit came into her life, she slowly but surely grew with her body image and eating habits.

• “What helped me in recovering (was) realizing all the amazing things my body was capable of, and how much I should appreciate it and be thankful for it,” Jackson explained. “I finally realized stressing about what your body looks like just wastes precious time in our lives.”

And so while CrossFit is most certainly healing some young athletes as they grow up and navigate a new world of social media and body comparisons, the issues that athletes like Emma Spath have faced are prevalent and concerning.